Monday, April 26, 2010

I am still an option that you have...

You can see the undulations in my emotional well-being by the number of posts I have in a given period of time. I generally don't share things when I'm happy. (Unless it is an attempt at a concert or some kick-ass hand sanitizer.) And my last post was about someone else being unhappy. Which in turn made me unhappy cause I don't know how to make him not unhappy. Although it was a very concrete event that made him unhappy and it will pass. But in the interim, I really wish there was something I could do. This week is such a bad week for the two of us. Our schedules are pretty much the exact opposite. He works 7-5, I work 4-9:30. On the days I don't work, I stupidly made plans. (Stupidly? Like I could've known that I would feel the burden of trying to make someone smile.) (Also, why do I feel this burden? No one told me I have to cheer him up...and generally I just pretend like nothing is wrong.)

Then there is a whole new level of suck right now. I was using my laptop, as I do every other day at my friend's house. And then I drove home. And now the charger doesn't work. It's as if my paycheck didn't even exist. Because I had to buy a new adapter and gas. And...have about $10 left from it. Good thing it basically doubles this next week. Unfort'ly I have to wait until Friday. annnd don't work on Friday. So I have to drive the 12 miles into town to pick it up. And direct deposit needs to be done with my computer...which as we have heard, is worthless right now.

Also on the table of "wtf is going on with my life?":
A proposal of new living arrangements. Approximately 15 minutes would be shaved off my driving to work time. And...that's about the only plus side I see. I mean, no utilities, but...I don't know. There is way too much for me to think about in my life right now.

I'm bad at being an adult. I need to be a child again. With someone who can take care of me. (And this idea speaks volumes about another aspect of my life...which does not belong on this blog.)

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