Sunday, May 17, 2009

I Hate Security pt. 2

The Security saga continues.

1. The fire alarm went off at exactly the same time as it did on Friday night.

2. It was our apartment's "fault" because our smoke alarm is broken, and therefore we think we can do anything we want.

3. Security is now claiming that they never knew about our alarms being dead and such. And that they never came into our apartment at 2:54 am on Friday to check on things. (for a refresher click) They have no record of Carri calling them about the Carbon Monoxide detector beeping. They have no record of BEATING MY DOOR DOWN and coming into my room while we were sleeping.

4. When I return to my apartment after freezing to death outside, Nate (a blog post of his own) is standing in our living room. The conversation that follows is almost word for word (with parts missing) of what occurred. My answers are not exaggerated here for effect - I actually said these things to security...
"Who lives here?"
"I live here, but I'm going to pee. So you can wait." (I was drunk) I can hear Carri talking about the situation described in 3. I come back out.
"So, you live here? Can I see your ID?"
"Sure! If I can find it." I ruffle through some shit and find it on the counter under a clam shell.
"Oh good, it's nice and sticky."
"Not my fault. And I don't care."
"Ok, who was smoking in here?"
*we don't say anything*
"Ashes don't just appear. Come on fess up. Who did it?"
Someone else says, "He left awhile ago. I don't know his name." (Which ps, was COMPLETELY TRUE)
"Right. So since none of you can fess up to this, even though I know it was one of you, I'll just blame it on all of you. And if the fire alarm goes off again, I'll write you guys up for the other violations and confiscate your alcohol. You can't have it in your common room."
Now, I wanted to say, "Oh, you mean the kitchen where the FRIDGE is? We're all fucking 21 or older. Blow me."
But none of us said anything. and he exits with the wonderful phrase, "Have a good night anyway," followed by a sarcastic laugh. Something like "Well, I showed them...Stupid college kids."

Needless to say, I am quite ecstatic to meet with Student Development about this. It's going to be a blast because I'm going to rat the douches out in a heartbeat. And I'm going to refuse to pay any fines because 1. security knew it was broken, 2. they were assholes about it, and 3. I didn't do anything wrong.

I hope Nate gets fired.

Now playing: Fiona Apple - Shadowboxer
via FoxyTunes

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