Sunday, August 01, 2004

It's Been Awhile

So, it has been forever since I last posted. I guess I've been kinda busy. I've been buying stuff for my dorm room and stuff. I also started making a present for my friend who is leaving in a week for Florida. I'm gonna miss her so much :( But anyway. I bought textbooks today. I spent $345.95. Good lord, that was almost half of my entire bank account. I might as well just close out the account and hand them the money. I also have to buy a Bible, but I think I'll use the one I have since I'll be saving $10. The church gave me one with my name on it and it's really nice.

I went to Brittney's graduation party today. I had fun but I found out she's moving in November. Why??? I hate this part in my life. All my friends are going their separate ways. I hope I can keep in touch with some of them. I would really hate to lose all my friends. I know I'll make new ones in college, but still. It's not fair. Her sister is really slutty and annoying. She always plays with her belly button ring and her boyfriend is...well, retarded. I feel bad for Brittney because her family sucks.

So back to me being poor. I want to die. I wish I had money. Maybe I will waste a couple bucks and buy lottery tickets. And then pray that I win.

I decided I'm going to write a movie script and discovered that it's really not that hard to make dialogue, but the stage directions are a whole other story. It's easier for me then a book, because I can write excellent dialogue, but I totally suck at description and other non-dialogue things. I either write too much or not enough; it's never just right. I don't really have a lot figured out, like the title, characters, know. I have one scene done and I read the whole thing out loud to test it. I have four pages in the scene. I also act it out and make notes on my little clipboard as I do it. Then I read through it tons more times to see if I like it. So far, it's good, but I don't know how to get across the way I want things said in writing. I could tell someone, demonstrate it, but not write it.

I have a huge stack of books waiting to be read. But, it's so hot in my house that I never feel like reading. I want to read them very badly, but I can't find time or get comfortable enough to read. I just keep looking at them thinking, I'll read now...and I'll start. Then someone will come over or call and I don't look at the book again for awhile. I think I'll take one or two to NC with me.

I leave in 13 days for The Outer Banks. Then it's off to college. YAY!!! sarcasm I am kinda excited, but not thrilled that I'm leaving my whole family. Everytime I look at the tuition bill, I get a little nauseous. It's so much and it's happening so quickly....I don't want to go...*tear* I think I'll miss my dad the most. Sure, I'll miss everyone...but since I live with my dad, I think it'll be hard for me to say good-bye on move-in day when he drives home and I'm standing in the doorway waving. I'll cry so much and I don't care who sees me. I really don't give a shit. He's been there for me through everything and I don't want to leave him.

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